Tuesday, 25 June 2013

T'was the night before...exam results.

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So. D-Day.

The battle I have been fighting for a year to 9 months is now here.

A year ago I found I failed my exam the first time. 9 months ago I found I failed the re-sit.

At lunchtime today, I will find out if I have passed or not.

This whole process has cost me so much:

- Mental exhaustion, stress, depression
- Stress on my family
- A lot of weight
- So much money spent
- I have lost friends
- I have lost my relationship
- A lot of my faith in humanity

Yet I have come out the other side as a much stronger person. I'd like to think anyway.

The sad thing is, that even if I did pass, I don't know if I want to go back. I fought the battle for this long, but maybe it was for the point of fighting the battle? The whole experience has been tainted so much.

Another sad thing, is that I am so used to failing now, that I am pretty sure that I will have to stay anyway.

Either way, I can't wait to get it out the way. I am crapping myself.

Tears stream down your face,
and I will fix you.


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